Postcards of Grief

Mourning is a process.

Comments on breast cancer by proxy, written by a woman coping with the loss of her mother.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005


Hey, guess what? Ebry's a fetus!

Ebry is somewhere around 1.5 to 2.0cm long, and is in the process of developing her/his various organs. The upcoming developmental stage, as you will see in the image below, is the Development of the Evil Plot.

Ebry devises an evil plot

Note how the tiny fetus's fingers touch à la Mr. Burns.

Brooke and I are reading up on babies in order to get ahead. Important lessons include How to Avoid Being Peed On and How to Teach Small People to Fall Asleep. Any suggestions on parenting books will be accepted. I think we have our hands full.


At 5:45 PM, Blogger alice, uptown said...

Ebry looks very special. I suspect the first books you'll need are such epics as "How to stop Ebry from kicking in utero," or that best-seller of all times, "how to quiet small people when their vocalizations exceed your noise tolerance level." This being the 21st century, you'll have to take the no-drugs edition.

At 9:26 AM, Anonymous Nella said...

Sorry if i sound dense, but which is the actual size? The really tiny picture or the bigger one?
I have no idea about your questions, unfortunately!

At 10:57 AM, Blogger Emilin said...

Actual size is the little one. According to this image, the fetus is between 13 and 18 mm.

At 12:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can I suggest Kaz Cooke's A Bun in the Oven and Kidwrangling? Amazon has both, with reviews.

I haven't read either of them, but I have read her earlier stuff and it's pretty good.

At 7:28 PM, Blogger PPB said...

I don't know nothing about birthing no babies, but I do love Operating Instructions by the inimitable Anne Lamott

At 12:00 PM, Blogger She said...

Ahem. Considering that Ebry is still very, very far away from needing the best book on child raising I ever read ("Yes, Your Teen is Crazy"), I'm afraid that the only suggestions I can make are of the "take care of yourself" sort...you know, ginger is good for heartburn, take your prenatal vitamin at night if it makes you queasy, that sort of thing. Yes, the morning sickness thing really haunts me, even now. I hope you are spared that particular hell.

At 12:00 PM, Blogger She said...

Oh, and the Mr. Burns thing made me belly laugh...

At 1:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congrats on the newest member of your family :) My partner and I want to do this someday. I second the Anne Lamott book suggestion.


At 3:33 PM, Blogger Smithie said...

If you PM me your address on the Phoenix, I will send you many books. Because I went batshit crazy buying books, and now I need to get them off J's bookshelf to make room for all the books that belong to HIM.

God, I'm so excited for you. I think I was more giddy the day we passed into the "fetal stage" than the day day the baby came out. That's when I stopped hedging about the pregnancy and started believing that everything would be fine and I would reallytruly have a baby.

At 11:29 AM, Blogger AltMama said...

Congratulations!! It's always so wonderful and life affirming to see things going well for people.

There's a column on bookslut.com about pregnancy/baby books, but they haven't reviewed much yet (no Anne Lammot yet, sadly). But you might check it out.

At 12:06 PM, Blogger Mustang Sally said...

This is what happens when I don't check my blogroll for a couple of weeks! Wow!! I am so incredibly thrilled for you two! It's a race here at my desk as to which is going hit the keyboard first, though -the tears of joy or sorrow.

Being pregnant made me hyperaware of the fragility of life and the mortality of myself and those I love. I was reduced to choking sobs one day just at the thought that my mom wouldn't be able to make the 3 hour drive in time for Duncan's birth to be with me. I couldn't imagine not having her emotional support during labor.

I had to escape to the ladies room in search of tissue and composure just now after trying to imagine what you must be going through. I can't do it. There aren't enough cyber-hugs in the world.

Just know that I am in absolute awe of your courage and determination. You can do this - she will be with you in spirit. She's probably up there with Ebry right now coaching him/her on how wonderful life is going to be with his/her mama's. How he/she'll be loved and adored. Along with some practical tips like how he/she should deal with Uncle Jackass and the rest of the Clan. I bet you see her smile in Ebry's toothless, drooling grin. :)

You two are going to be amazing parents. Just amazing. No kid could be luckier than to win you and Brooke in the parental lottery. I'm just sayin'! As far as books go, the Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy (Lovine?) was a hoot.

At 12:32 PM, Blogger selzach said...

Congratulations! Cool pic of Ebry.

No good advice for either of your questions. A strategically placed wipe or washcloth can help avoid pee disasters, but anytime Peanut pees, if it doesn't hit me, it somehow manages to at least get on his clothes.

Getting baby to sleep? I seriously need help with that one. We broke down and started co-sleeping with Peanut. The good thing is that he sleeps well in bed with us. The bad thing is that he won't sleep alone for more than a couple of hours and generally refuses to fall asleep by himself. We are so wrapped around his little finger.


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