Postcards of Grief

Mourning is a process.

Comments on breast cancer by proxy, written by a woman coping with the loss of her mother.

Thursday, February 26, 2004

Part III: Semi-Attack of the Colons

More than one person approached me with the comment that I must be Suzanne's daughter. My best friend's mother (who convinced my friend not to come out from medical school for the funeral) hugged me tightly and said that she had been doing okay until she looked at a photo of young Mom and saw me. Strangely, my grandmother, Mom's mother, was cordial and mildly chatty with everyone except me. I realized days later, after being confused and put off by her ignoring me, that I look like the daughter she rejected. I bear a striking resemblance to my mother, so striking that on her deathbed, yellow and withered, the likeness was still pronounced. For whatever reason, my grandmother did not want to communicate with her daughter's doppelganger.

We returned home to eat and hang out with friends and watch the Sardines (huh!) and Pork and Beans (huh!) video and eat macaroni and cheese and pasta salad. All the while, fellow bloggers Leigh Anne and Terri were plotting with Brooke about getting that on the Internet in video form.

The DVD was not fixed by Monday, and I expressed my disappointment politely but clearly. I did not intend to embarrass the director, but that may have been the end result, and I'm not sure whether I'm upset with myself for it. Dad had prepared a sign to put up in case the changes had not been made. It read: Sorry – Corrected version still not available. (Suzanne would be annoyed.) I was relieved not to have to spend so much time railing on about the inappropriate use of a semicolon; the sign was adequate.


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